Good Things About CV and Small Towns

The good thing about small towns is that you know everyone and everyone knows (of/about) you. The not so wonderful thing is exactly the same! The Cedar Vale of my memories is a good place full of honest and friendly people, and a few “ornery boys”. Sometimes, I’m sure, I was one of those boys.

Contrary to what you may have inferred from my previous posts, I do not believe that growing up in Cedar Vale was negative for me. I have many happy memories of CV and the people there. I would not trade my experiences for any other. I like the people and atmosphere, but I would probably not consider moving back because of the wonderful setting that I am in now.

I was privileged to have most things that money would buy, as my father had figured out in his later years how to make more than just a living. I knew that I had more spending money than some of my friends, but I did not believe that we were rich or wealthy. Looking back, I know that we were “well off” and that I was lucky to the “late” child in the family.

One of the good things about small towns is that school class sizes are smaller and you can get more individual attention. Of course, that also comes with reduced choices of subjects. High school was not a waste of time for me as I really enjoyed many of the classes and activities. However, it did not challenge me very much … except for Spanish (irony now!). This was a big problem when I got to Kansas State University and had problems with many classes from the start. I eventually figured it out and graduated with a BS in Radio-TV from Oklahoma State (no foreign language required for a BS at OSU!).

I never though much about what was lacking in CV as I had use of a car and could drive to Ark City, Winfield, or Wichita for anything that we did not have. Electronic parts were ordered from Chicago. In later years as I returned to visit, it became apparent that what we had when I was growing up had mostly dried up and gone away. That is a real shame, but somewhat understandable.

I probably enjoyed the time in CV from age 7 through 14 the most. When I was 7, we moved to CV from the farm. As I have mentioned, I had my own playground with a “ranch” at the edge of town.

I have fond memories of Margaret Robinson (Kennedy) and the “extras” that her family provided to myself and the others in our class. Margaret’s folks paid to have an instructor come to their house to teach our entire class to dance. What little I know about dancing came from that experience. They also built a tennis court where I spent many hours playing. It was the only tennis court in CV. I also used to go to her house early on Saturday mornings to watch TV, before we had a set at home. Her mom was always patient with me, even though Margaret might still be sleeping.

Another good thing about CV is the hunting and fishing opportunities that I took advantage of while growing up. I no longer hunt or fish but the memories are good.

When I was growing up I couldn’t figure out why all of the good, church going people would loudly proclaim love, peace and forgiveness on Sunday and exhibit very different behaviors on the other six days of the week. Later, a pastor asked my why I didn’t come to church more often. I said; “It seems that many who come are hypocrites.” His reply was; “Come on down, there’s always room for one more!” How true.

Those who have gone through a divorce or other tragedy often find that those individuals thought to be close friends disappear, while others who may not have been close now befriend us in great and unusual ways. This has happened to me, not only later in life, but in my experiences in CV both with teachers and individuals that my father helped greatly, but who later refused to help me in the smallest of ways. I have become stronger and less dependent on the support and opinions of others because of this. As I expect less from people, I often am pleasantly surprised when I receive more.

I have spent a lot of time in independent spiritual study and I have found that which is true for me. One definition of “truth” is “a consensus to reality”, so whatever you believe is OK with me. Some might say I have become “enlightened” and words often mean what they say. However, I think the most important thing that I have learned and wish to pass on is this: “Both before and after enlightenment, one must cut wood and carry water.”

I wish a happy, healthy, peaceful, and prosperous New Year for each of you!

Jay D. Mills – Volcan, Chiriqui, Panama 12-29-07

FYI

1 I just spoke with Shirley Brown and she had word from her daughter-in-law (who is Judy Huddle French's daughter) that Judy had come thru the surgery very well and will stay in the Wichita hospital (I don't know which one) another day or two. As soon as possible Judy will be taken back to Neodesha for rehab in the specialty facility there.

2 Some will remember that I wrote of a hospital tenant, a nursing home facility, and a new grocery store. Well everything is on hold--still. The longer it takes to develop the more doubtful I become. Nothing is dead yet, so maybe something will happen after the first of 2008.
The person who will install a grocery store says it will happen after the hospital is occupied.

3 I hear a goodly amount of favorable reaction from those who have seen postings in the CV Lookout. Now I know of some CV grads, younger than us, in their 30s, who have found the site and are starting to explore it. Joel Haden III says he is telling his crowd about it and recommending it.

4 Wintry mix and rain started falling about 11 am today. now the temperature has dropped and sleet mixed with snow is falling heavily and the wind is gusting. I know you all wish you were here.

Ice Storm Photo

Does this look familiar all you ex CVers? This photo just in from Don Cox. He tells me that CV missed this one but there are more coming.

My Offspring

Gary White

Excellent choice of topic, Diane. I’ll give you the complete rundown on my offspring.

My daughter, Steph, lives and works in Portland, OR. She is a store manager in a big box store—a local chain, not one of the biggies. Her partner K. C. is disabled and takes care of the home. Steph was born in 1969 in Ames, IA, where I was teaching.

My son, Greg, lives and works just outside of Boulder, CO. He and his wife, Kristin, have two boys, Owen, age 3, and Max, age 6. Greg is a research engineer for a group called Cable Labs, which does research and development for the cable TV and communications industry, world wide. He is currently hard at work on the next generation of cable modems that will link all communications systems in your home, including security, internet, phone, TV, other two-way communications, etc. He was born in 1970, also in Ames. Kristin is a speech pathologist for the school system in their area.

My stepson, Jesse, lives and works in Irvine, CA. He and his wife, Yui, have a little girl, Sophie, age 4 months. Jesse is a programmer for the computer gaming industry, a position he has had for around 14 years. He does the deepest, most complicated programming that makes the games operate. I don’t really understand what that is about. Yui, who is a Japanese citizen, works in the export/import industry where she can use her language abilities in Chinese, Japanese, and English. Jesse was born in 1970, and was a classmate of my son, Greg, and his wife, Kristin.